24

Jack's back! Time for some serious terrorist @$$-kicking!

I'll be...

*LISTENING TO:*
Song: I'll Be
Artist: Edwin McCain
Album: Misguided Roses
Quote: "...tell me that we belong together, dress it up with the trappings of love. I'll be captivated, I'll hang from your lips, instead of the gallows of heartache that hang from above. I'll be your cryin' shoulder. I'll be love's suicide. I'll be better when I'm older. I'll be the greatest fan of your life."
* * *

Ah, an interesting weekend... one that was spiritually enlightening... yet not quite productive from an academic standpoint. And I'm fine with that. It was a welcome respite from acadamia and a time to ponder what God's been trying to tell me and just soak in His teachings told from a variety of people.

Friday, got back from class and rushed to pick up the Wong sisters on the way to heading to Ashley's house in Barrhaven for the Celebration Church Leadership Retreat. They were able to invite a pastor from out of town, Paul Johnson, to speak to us about leadership the whole retreat (and Sunday service). I found what he had to say quite insightful and I appreciated his openness in sharing his own life struggles and mistakes as well as his successes and accomplishments as a leader and as a pastor. For the most part, he reinforced my previously-known values about leadership but also challenged me to evaluate my role as leader and if I have the qualifications to be a good leader. In short, I believe I do have a calling to be a leader (as well as a worship leader) but I still need to work on improving my qualities to become a truly effective leader...which I don't feel I'm there yet. Anyway, apart from learning a bit, a joy of the retreat for me was to get to know the people at Celebration Church a little better and just hang out with them (and hopefully, for them to get to know me apart from the short asian dude that plays the guitar or piano on Sundays). We were able to get a couple of poker tables going well into the late evening which turned out to be pretty fun. I didn't stay overnight like most of them did though, just 'cause I didn't quite feel that comfortable yet (since I didn't know them THAT well yet) but sessions with Paul resumed the next morning after a brief slumber. Overall, it was a good retreat. My worship music time (which I was responsible for) could have been better...slight miscommunication... but I think that next time, I'll get it right. :) I'm still wondering if I fully fit in with that bunch... but it was a good first step.

Saturday, got back home in the afternoon and took a much-needed nap to recuperate from the previous evening's lack of sleep. Succeeded in doing some readings but also decided to take the time to keep the spiritual-knowledge input going so I went through a few parts of 7:22's Love & Marriage series, looking ahead since we're covering the whole series at H20 Fellowship over the next month or two. Again, the speaker reinforced many of my own personal values and thoughts that I've developped on the topic... and also stirred my brain to think of some new insights as well. It's a good series and one I hope will spark discussion at H20 Fellowship when we cover 'em.

Sunday, led worship with the worship team at Celebration once again... and I feel we're always improving and really starting to gel. Merlin, an occasional worship team member and new Celebration friend, gave his testimony and what he had to say got me thinking of where God wants me to be once I graduate. I won't be graduating as early as I hoped... which kinda sucks... but I know God has a plan and maybe he means for me to stick around a little longer... I was inspired by Merlin's conviction in God's calling and how he's turning down 6-figure income jobs to come to Ottawa and serve at Celebration. I really respect his diligence and his courage for doing that... especially in a world where it seems that money is everything. I wonder where God is calling me?... perhaps I should be still and listen... we learned at the retreat that God has annointed us with dreams... I've had the dream of leading worship in front of hundreds/thousands of my generation for a while now... which doesn't seem all that realistic to me... or is it?... *sigh*... I dunno... in the mundane world of school, it's hard to dream big I guess... I still feel at a standstill in life, like I haven't been moving much, doing much, or accomplishing much these past few years... is there more for me than just finding a job in Marketing?... can I even find a job once I graduate... when will I actually graduate?... or am I actually called into ministry?... what does God have planned for me?... what is He calling me to do?...

"Come and listen...come to the water's edge, all who are thirsty come..." -DCB

*caution: pointless rambling and babbling ahead...for which I apologize*

And finally, to piggy-back on that... comes that all-too-familiar personal struggle of finding that "special someone". Dunno why I'm writing about it, but it's been on my mind and on my heart heavily the past few weeks for some reason... culminating in watching the 7:22 Love & Marriage series... and I guess I just had to get it off my chest. Again, I don't know what God has planned for me, although I know it'll be something great. Being 23 and single, I've noticed that I've been getting jabs from adults and parents on that issue as of late... which, frankly, I get a little annoyed at. I dunno... I just don't want to "hook up" with anyone or shed that single status just for the heck of it... I have a very distinct idea on the type of person I'd want to spend the rest of my life with and I feel that it's just a waste of time to beat around the bush and "play around". But that's just me. Yes, my first failed relationship has left scars... but I've grown and learned from them... and I know where we went wrong and why it didn't work out in the end. At the time, I couldn't realize that... but now I know why God tore us apart and why at such a tender young age, we were just not ready for a committed lasting relationship. I guess I'm so apprehensive and cautious about starting a new relationship with someone because I don't want to fall into the same pitfalls. I know now, for certain, that my next relationship has to be a God-centered and God-driven relationship... Yes, I've had a longing to truly love someone...not just "fall in love"... but only recently have I realized/learned that my reasons and ways for loving someone need to be fine-tuned and separated from what the world tells us "love" is. A lot of what was covered in that 7:22 series is so true and I definitely take it to heart. Despite all this "knowledge" that I've acquired though, love remains elusive and reality definitely does not match the "perfect coincidences" that tv shows or movies elude to. Bad luck doesn't help either... heheh. Why, does it seem, that whenever I find someone I feel I can connect with, that I have that weird feeling in my gut that there's something special about this person and that she may be the one I can pour my heart into... that person is unavailable or taken? *sigh*... Just today, I was pondering that I might as well just give up on a hopeless what-was-I-thinking-duh-she'd-never-feel-the-same-way situation... and yet a quick daydream sometimes brings that hope back... *sigh*... Coincidences aren't coincidences are they? Certain connections are just stronger somehow right? I really dunno...

"...I wish you'd look at me that way, your beautiful eyes looking deep into mine, telling me more than any words could say, but you don't even know I'm alive. Baby, to you, all I am is the invisible man..."

Despite all this pointless rambling and babbling, despite occasional faltering moments of doubt and worry, I am confident. I am confident God will provide in His time, when He knows I'm ready, prepared, and equipped. What I've learned is that my focus shouldn't be on what I want for myself or what I feel is best for myself right now... but what God wants from me. I know that there are areas that I still need to work on, to improve (bible knowledge, for one), habits to die, and skills to develop... in order to be prepared to become the head of a household according to His word. God knows me better than I even know myself... I may think I'm ready but God knows better... and until I find that special someone, I'll keep trusting in Him. Sometimes I wonder if that someone is even in this city?... in this country?... or is it someone I pass by every week without even knowing it... I dunno... but I do wonder if that someone is thinking of me the same way... Hoping, longing, patiently waiting...

"If I could only read your mind, tell me the answer I would find, do you dream of me?" -MWS

***
Hillsong United:
"Till I See You"

The greatest love that anyone could ever know
That overcame the cross and grave to find my soul
And till I see You face to face and grace amazing takes me home
I'll trust in You

With all I am I'll live to see Your kingdom come
And in my heart I pray You'd let Your will be done
And till I see You face to face and grace amazing takes me home
I'll trust in You

I will live to love You
I will live to bring You praise
I will live a child in awe of You

You are a voice that called the universe to be
You are the whisper in my heart that speaks to me
And till I see You face to face and grace amazing takes me home
I'll trust in you

You alone are God of all
You alone are worthy Lord
And with all I am my soul will bless Your name
***

Baby penguins are the cutest little things...

Just finished watching the movie March of the Penguins. I highly recommend it, btw... beautiful shots, gorgeous footage, and a nature-told unscripted heart-warming story. What a Creator...

H20 Fellowship - Snowflake Gala 2005 pics!

Ahh... a wonderful evening of familar faces old and new, more chicken and cheesecake than I've seen all year, and a cooking team that just rocks! :)

(I know these pics (and post) are up late, sorry 'bout that!)


Our lovely program for the evening, created by none other than Steph Wong :)


H20 Fellowship's very own Coyotes


H20 Fellowship's very own Abbott & Costello... "who's on first?"


Bonnie & I


Guys...


...& Dolls


...and another candid shot of the beautiful ladies

Tim's New Year Movie Reviews

Crash

Starring: Don Cheadle, Thandie Newton, Matt Dillon, Sandra Bullock
Director: Paul Haggis
Rating: ****

Not to be confused with the 1996 David Cronenberg drama with the same title, Crash is a wonderfully written, directed, and acted film that portrays the common stereotypes of racism and smartly intertwines the interactions of a diverse group of characters facing or victimized by such stereotypes.

The intriguing screenplay may remind some of the intersection storylines of Traffic. The diverse group of characters include a racist cop and his offended partner, an immigrant father and storeowner, a black director and wife, a young Hispanic locksmith, and an attorney's wife, to name a few. At the beginning of the film, each character is set in their views of society and racism, whether it is how it affects them or how they treat others. By the end, it is fascinating to observe how such views are moulded, shaped, or even drastically changed.

The direction and writing of Paul Haggis (who also penned the screenplay of Million Dollar Baby) effectively adapts his complicated screenplay onto the screen. The acting is also strong throughout, without any primary actor taking a "lead" role per say, which is how the roles should have been acted. Most of the actors are familiar, reliable faces who have delivered strong supporting roles in the past. Even those with higher profiles (ie. Sandra Bullock and Don Cheadle) are professional enough to keep their performances low-key and within the context of the film.

The combination of such factors and the importance of the issues explored makes Crash an excellent film to behold, and one that challenges everyone to reconsider their initial perceptions of anyone racially different then themselves. In my opinion, Crash is one of the best and most important films of 2005.


The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe

Starring: Georgie Hentley, Skandar Keynes, William Moseley, Anna Popplewell, Tilda Swinton
Director: Andrew Adamson
Rating: ***1/2

I'm sure to get a lot of backlash for making this statement, but I think I actually enjoyed Narnia more than the Lord of the Rings. If anything, for the simple reason that I read the book when I was a kid and I remember loving the cartoon version. Unfortunately, I have never read the Lord of the Rings books. So, for me, there is a certain amount of nostalgia when watching my childhood stories come to life.

For those who don't know, TCON:TLWW tells the fantasy tale of four children, Peter, Susan, Edmund, and Lucy, who find a gateway into the mythical land of Narnia through a wardrobe in their uncle's old home. Little do they know, they are all destined to affect the future of Narnia, which is ruled by the White Witch and is placed in a perpetual state of winter. Hope remains, however, in the form a lion named Aslan who, with the children's help, hopes to overthrow the White Witch's rule.

While disappointing to some, Narnia was filmed without the darkness of the LOTR films and without the emphasis on magic of the Harry Potter films. Instead, the film has a certain charm that carves a niche of its own while capably balancing the mystique of the mythical land of Narnia and its characters with the grandiose spectacle of the inevitible large battle scene at the climax. While the special effects are impressive (in most parts) and help the audience visual Narnia and its characters, I believe it is the performances of the children that really carry the movie. Lucy's character, in particular, was very effective and the casting director's choice of casting unknowns as opposed to familiar young faces (such as Dakotah Fanning and Haley Joel Osment) was the right choice.

Finally, since the Narnia series was written by C.S. Lewis with many Christian influences, it is quite rewarding for Christians to pick out the symbolism and lineages between the Narnia story and the Jesus story. Overall, Narnia is the perfect Christmas/winter movie and I enjoyed it thoroughly.


The Island

Starring: Ewan McGregor, Scarlett Johansson, Sean Bean, Steve Buscemi
Director: Michael Bay
Rating: ***

Here are a few things one should expect from a Michael Bay film: LOUD explosions, an elaborate chase scene or two...or three, one-dimensional characters, a paper-thin plot, quick camera cuts, a big big budget, good-looking leads, lots of testosterone, and just a fun, wild ride. Knowing all that, you shouldn't be disappointed with his latest offering, The Island. While Bay's films are traditionally slammed by critics and will never win an Oscar, they do offer a fun escape from reality where you can just turn off your brain, turn on your loudest sound system, sit back, and munch on some popcorn. In essence, action movies such as The Island are great fun and meant to be enjoyed, with no need to deconstruct the acting, the screenplay, or the directing. And isn't that what watching movies is all about? Yes, the acting could have been better. Yes, the plot has many holes. Yes, I lost count of the number of chase scenes. Yes, Steve Buscemi is in it. But who cares as long as I'm having fun while watching it. And I did.

Essentially, the film is about a whole civilization/factory of unaware clones, run by the Sean Bean character. The clones are "grown" for their body parts and organs in order to prolong the life of their real counterparts in the real world. When, two clones escape (the McGregor and Johansson characters), the chase is on as they attempt to contact their real life duplicates. The storyline is actually more complex than your usual action movie fare, which is refreshing, and the future world that the writers envisioned is intruiging to discover.

Overall, an entertaining movie that is sure to please crowds.


The Exorcism of Emily Rose

Starring: Laura Linney, Tom Wilkinson, Jennifer Carpenter, Campbell Scott
Director: Scott Derrickson
Rating: ***

William Friedkin's The Exorcist remains, to this day, one of the most disturbing and frightening movies in the horror genre, topping many lists as the scariest movie every made. Having watched it, I definitely found it disturbing and draining, and would choose never watch it again. While The Exorcism of Emily Rose contains certain similarities to The Exorcist, but approaches the controversial topic of exoricism from a completely different viewpoint. Those expecting TEOER to be a scary horror movie will be disappointed. This film is more a courtroom drama than a horror movie, although there are still some frightening scenes that make me question the PG-13 rating.

For the horror genre, I thought this courtroom twist was actually quite refreshing. The film follows a priest, Father Moore (Wilkinson) who is placed on trial for the murder of a university girl, Emily Rose (Carpenter), while performing an exorcism. Erin Bruner (Linney) is the defence lawyer assigned to Father Moore and faces the challenge of proving that Emily Rose was, in fact, possessed by demonic forces. The prosecutor argues that Emily Rose died of negligence on the part of Father Moore, and that Emily's condition was caused by psychotic illness and medical reasons. All of the scenes that depict Emily's possession are filmed in flashback during the courtroom proceedings. The movie, in essence, brings a debate of the possibility of the existence of demonic forces. The movie was filmed appropriately with a dark atmosphere, and the performances are strong across the board.

Overall, the movie was effective at stirring interest in the debate but I felt it was a little shallow in its observations and analysis of the issue. However, for fans of the genre, I think the film is worth watching for the strong performances by its actors and its different approach to the topics of exorcism and demon possession. TEOER is not your typical horror movie and the production quality rises the film above its material and above many other horror flicks out there.


Into the Blue

Starring: Paul Walker, Jessica Alba, Scott Caan, Ashley Scott
Director: John Stockwell
Rating: ***

I approached Into the Blue with apprehension. From the trailers, you can tell this was going to be one of those action movies whose primary mission is to blatantly accentuate the physical features of its young stars, making the girls go "oooh" over Paul Walker's abs and the guys go "ahhh" over Jessica Alba's...well... everything. And initially, I would be correct. But fortunately, the movie actually develops into a decent thriller with some interesting plot twists and some beautiful exotic scenery.

Jared (Walker) and Sam (Alba) are a young couple very much in love, living in a beautiful tropical paradise, and apparently so poor that they can't afford to buy shirts or pants. Jared dreams of a richer life and is an avid treasure hunter in his spare time. When his old friend, Bryce (Caan), and his temporary girlfriend (Scott) visit, the group goes diving and uncovers two very different valuable treasures, an old sunken ship with the possibility of treasure, and a crashed plane containing a large cocaine shipment. Jared is now faced with an ethical dilemma, with Bryce edging him on to take the easy money, and Sam trying to convince him to stay righteous. It doesn't take long for danger to surface as dangerous people will stop at nothing to acquire both forms of loot.

John Stockwell previously directed Blue Crush and in both films, shows a knack for filming beautiful underwater/tropical scenery while making his young stars look good... unfortunately, that seems to be all he's proficient at. Oh, and he seems to have found a magical place where the lead characters can hold their breath underwater indefinitely. The acting, as expected, is lacklustre, with the leads showing more skin than emotion and acting prowess. Alba does a decent job in her limited role but Walker is just as wooden as I remember him from The Fast and the Furious.

Overall, Into the Blue fulfilled my short list of initial expectations but surprised me with more than expected by turning out to be an enjoyable and effective action/thriller/adventure movie.


Saw II

Starring: Donnie Wahlberg, Shawnee Smith, Tobin Bell, Dina Meyer
Director: Darren Lynn Bousman
Rating: ***

The original Saw movie was a tension-filled contraption that, despite its small budget and indie-film status, impressed me with its originality, shocking plot twists, devious puzzles, and sense of urgency. For fans of the first Saw movie, Saw II offers more of what was enjoyable in the first one, but without the novelty of the original Saw's originality. The tag line suggests that "oh yes, there will be blood" and yes, there is a certain amount of gore in the movie, but much of the intrigue comes from HOW that blood is spilt.

The movie follows a number of diverse individuals who are locked in a house and exposed to a nerve gas that delivers death within an alotted time. Eric Mason (Walhberg) is the cop in charge of finding them and freeing them while dealing with their tormentor, Jigsaw (Bell). Numerous deadly booby traps abound in the house and you know most of the characters will not make it out alive by the end of the film. However, the creativity of the contraptions, the lingering tension, and the numerous plot twists and red herrings will leave viewers on the edge of their seats... or cowering underneath them.

Saw II is directed by a different director but Bousman is able to keep much of the mood, look, and style of the original Saw movie intact in its sequel. With a much lower-profile cast, the acting is not up to par as the original movie, but is sufficient enough to move the scenes along from one deathtrap to another.

Overall, like all sequels, Saw II loses a bit of the charm of originality that the original Saw movie had. However, right from its opening scene, Saw II still delivers on the chills and thrills and offers a thinking man's horror/thriller flick in a similar mould to the movie Identity.